Attending the Mississippi School for Mathematics and Science gives us, as students, more personal autonomy over our decisions.  If I want to (and my privilege plan allows it, my car has enough gas in it and my wallet has enough cash), I can go get takeout, buy a bunch of books at Books-a-Million, or even run to Kroger for playdoh (I only did that once).  Living away from my parents enables me to do things without an extremely authoritative, questioning voice; while ResLife staff member on duty typically looks over my card for sign-out destinations, rarely ever am I stopped for the validity of running to Hobby Lobby to buy another terrarium (I only did that once also). 

Beyond sign-outs, I also have the capability to procrastinate my homework, stay up as late as I want, hang out with whoever I choose and eat whatever I want.  At home I had some independence in these personal decisions that affect my physical and mental health and well-being, the encouraging yet regulating presence of my parents sometimes forced me to deliberately reevaluate a situation.  Typically, I still went right ahead and lived by my original, instinctual decisions (mostly harmless like naming a fish Aqua Nova), but the guiding presence of my parents and other adults acted as a safeguard, a mental block against more radical, self-risking decisions. 

The second thought that my mother’s occasional questions of my motives precipitated or the internal debate that my father’s slightly confused, doubtful looks sparked is gone in the more self-reliant environment of MSMS.  The removal of this childhood authority figure by a one-hour car ride somewhat loosened my judgement.  Over the past two years, we, as MSMS students, have adapted to living in a relatively independent manner.  From time management for successful studying to social, peer-based choices, I have developed as an autonomous body, learning to debate choices personally and not rely on others to decide for me.  While I have made a few less-glamorous, unsuccessful decisions throughout the past two years of semi-independence, I have learned to value the trust placed in me by both my family and the MSMS staff.  These skills will hopefully ease my transition to college; like many past and current MSMS students, I am grateful for the “test-drive” of the college experience.

Getting in the car to drive back from a weekend at home on Sunday evenings, I am often reminded of the more controlled environment that was once my everyday experience.  As I shut the door against the dog trying to claw its way inside, my mother’s voice, alternating between conflicting worries about how I will ever get to sleep after drinking two soda and about me falling asleep at the wheel,  I remember how my choices were once more slow and debated. 

While I have not recklessly played around the last two years at MSMS, I have developed into a slightly more quick-paced decision-maker.  In the normal progression from living at home with parents to rooming with other teens in college, I believe students lose safeguards (parents, family and other reliable figures) against rash decisions.  While quick decisions are totally bad and detrimental to one’s self, self-regulation and awareness is necessary throughout our development and growth.  Instead of relying on the careful monitoring and chastisement of authoritative adults, students on the brink of adulthood should strive to internally govern themselves through difficult decisions. 

While cheesy, I believe with great power (to make personal decisions) comes great responsibility (to oversee personal decisions).